Original article written by Michaela Rae for Waterford.org
Gentle parenting is a popular parenting style that is centered around positive discipline. This parenting style is a way to teach your child important skills without using negative consequences or corporal punishment. If you are interested in practicing gentle parenting in your own home, you can begin by building a strong emotional connection with your child using the elements of gentle parenting.
The four main elements of Gentle Parenting are:
- Understanding your child
- Showing them empathy
- Establishing mutual respect
- Creating kind yet firm boundaries
Creating a Strong Emotional Connection
Creating a strong emotional connection with your child begins by changing the way you think about discipline and consequences. For example, by understanding that children throw tantrums when they don’t have all the tools to communicate the way adults do, parents can begin to show empathy and help teach their children new and important skills. When families are able to open up and express their emotions in a healthy way with each other, strong connections can begin to grow.
How to Empower Your Child
One of the key components of gentle parenting is modeling the behaviors you would like to see from your child. Children love to mimic adults, so by setting a good example and using empowering statements, you can help set them up for success. Here are some simple ways to rephrase common statements so that they encourage children to do their best at home and at school.
Instead of saying, “Pick up the toys now or you will sit in the naughty chair.”
Try saying, “Here is a timer. Let’s see how many toys you can pick up before it rings.”
Instead of saying, “You are too little, let me do it for you.”
Try saying, “I know you are excited to try, let me show you how to do it.”
Instead of saying, “It’s fine, I’ll just do it myself.”
Try saying, “It’s more fun if we work together. What will you do to help?”
What Are Natural Consequences?
Natural consequences are a way of children seeing the results of their own choices without adult interference. This approach creates an open environment that allows children to understand and learn from their mistakes without the use of harsh punishments. Gentle parenting has become a relief for many parents that don’t see results from traditional parenting styles that use negative consequences, like timeouts or taking away privileges.
When children are free to learn in a safe environment from their own mistakes and accomplishments, they can learn how to regulate and motivate themselves.
Tips for Practicing Gentle Parenting
- Encourage Play: Playtime is important to your child’s development because it allows them to learn self-control and creative problem-solving.
- Establish Unconditional Love: Let your child know that your love does not depend on their accomplishments, and offer hugs often.
- Set Realistic Goals: Young children need goals that match their abilities, choose activities that they can do independently to increase their self-confidence.
- Create a Welcoming Environment: Let your child know that mistakes are expected, accepted, and used as opportunities to grow.
- Be Honest: Don’t hide your failures from children, let them know that we all make mistakes and that even adults are not perfect.
- Avoid Sarcasm: Something that seems small to an adult can be a big deal for a child. When your child has a concern, remain positive and avoid cracking jokes or downplaying the situation.
- Foster Independence: Let your child try out new activities and encourage them to do their best so that they can learn about themselves and others in the process.
Forming a healthy relationship with your child can have a lasting impact on their future. I hope you’ll consider practicing this parenting style in your own home.
xoxo,
Michaela Rae
V. Studio 